Colorado Backcountry: The Tale of a Knuckledragger, a Free-Heelin’ Hippy, and The Know-It-All AT Skier

I'm very proud to present our second guest author and newest member of weknowsnow.com empire. Dave (iskibc) rips and doesn't take names -- so watch out. We recently completed a really fun and gnarly trip to Rocky Mountain National Park for some backcountry action. You can read Dave's account of the trip here. Be sure and check out the video, it's full of funny bushwhacking moments and lots of sweet turns down some of the steepest terrain in the park. Dave and Lacey pretty much rip.

Also, check out Dave's new blog! weknowsnow.com/iskibc/ -- I've heard rumors of a Mt. Democrat trip and I'm sure he'll be posting the details soon.

McHenrys Notch Couloir, McHenrys Peak 13,327’
jonpierre, iskibc, Lacey

McHenrys Notch Video Link or Download Link (right click - save as)

Once upon a time in a land where mountains rise higher than the sky and valley floors drop lower than the eye can see there lived a group of unique and distinct individuals. In a small nook of this awe inspiring and wondrous land lays the village of maggotdom. Now this is not your ordinary run of the mill village. The occupants of Maggotdom are a rather unique breed of individuals. No other place in the universe compares to the zany, kooky, perverted, titillated, stoke-induced, and deranged individuals who call Maggotdom home. There are three governing parties that make up Maggotdom, which consist of the knuckledraggers, the free-heelin’ hippies, and the know-it-all AT/alpine skiers. These governing bodies carry their own unique representation and practices, which makes for some rather interesting politics. In a small community such as Maggotdom, there is always dissonance.

This tale is about the journey of the knuckledragger, the free-heelin’ hippy, and the know-it-all AT skier, and their quest to seek out the hidden treasure of McHenrys Notch. All representing parties of Maggotdom live and feed off of adventure, exploration, and ripping big lines. One day when the moon and sun aligned, and the constellations in the nighttime sky were at a perfect fix, the 3 parties of maggotdom set foot for a feat that no other had accomplished.

The adventure begins deep in the forest and mountainous terrain of RMNP. This land is considered sacred among many, and is very well protected by those serving this land. There are many laws in place here where guardsmen stand at posts and collect fees for those passing by. However, on this adventure, the Maggotdom trio outsmarted the guardsman and passed through the gates freely while everyone was asleep and resting. They passed through the gates without confrontation and hurriedly made their way up to the starting point for their journey. Along the way a big fiery ball lit up the sky on the horizon, which provided much needed light for the group.

Some breathtaking and beautiful colors illuminated the sky as the trio continued to trek along the well-beaten path.

More beauty:

The first part of the journey was completed with ease as the trio followed a well defined and well marked path through the forest. Every now and then the large mountains in the distance would come into view and the group would pause to take in the beauty.



Now, the knuckledragger is not like all the other representatives from the knuckledragger party. This knuckledragger learned at a young age that full appreciation of the mountains comes from actually hiking them and riding them, not jibbing them or rail jamming them. This knuckledragger also has a much broader vocabulary than most other knuckledragging representatives in the world. His choice of adjectives are not limited to just “dope”, “rad”, “shred”, and “gnar”.

Up to this point in the journey the group had done well. They had covered several miles without confrontation, disagreement, or even shit talking. The group was unified and working as an actual team. Many hours into the journey the group came to the crux of the day.

THE BATTLE WITH THE GNAR

The hidden treasure of McHenrys Notch lies deep in a high hanging valley off the beaten path. There is no path or navigation to reach this hidden treasure. One must pretty much go through hell to reach this hanging valley. The Gnar is made up of steep and overgrown brush, 5th class rock, raging waterfalls, and dense forest for a good 1,500’ of vertical. The trio started their bushwhack up and through the challenging terrain with strong intentions and tired minds.

The knuckledragger battling the Gnar:

He's pretty good at climbing too:

They charged through the gnar with force as the gnar fought back with fury. Despite the challenging and frustrating conditions the trio had to face, they still continued to push forward. The gnar had many tricks up its sleeve, which would test the group like no other.

Time had passed, limits and patience were pushed, but the trio had finally reached the shelf and entrance to the hanging valley. However, the Gnar didn’t let the group pass by without first leaving it’s mark through scrapes, bruises, cuts, and frustration. Seeing the valley before their eyes, the trio celebrated their successful battle with the gnar and knew that travel would be much easier from here on out. They continued to move up and through the narrow hanging valley past serene lakes and rugged terrain. When the trio finally reached the end of the valley they were disappointed to not find any treasure. “Where is it” said the free-heelin’ hippy. The know-it-all AT skier tried to remain confident and optimistic that maybe it was hidden in the corner. The knuckledragger agreed and so the group pushed forward. Each step the little gleam of hope tucked away in the corner looked more promising. The knuckledragger blazed ahead of the other two in the group to get a better look. After a few minutes of steep climbing he burst out with celebration and amazement as he had located the hidden treasure known as the McHenrys Notch Couloir. There it stood, untouched and chock full of snow.

Knowing that the treasure existed the trio pushed harder and faster to make their way up the couloir. The couloir rose a good 1,200’ above the lower apron of the basin to a deep U-shaped notch separating McHenrys Peak from Powell Peak.

The snow was like gold to the trio. They had struck it rich and were devouring on its offerings.



They climbed up the steep and deep walled couloir until they reached the notch.

At the top of the notch the trio celebrated and toasted one another on a fine effort. Even though the climb up and through the notch was a good taste of the treasure, the descent is what made all of that effort and hard work pay off.

The knuckledragger asking the cameraman, "So, do I look dope in this pose? Rad maybe?"

Every turn, whether it be a carve, tele turn, or parallel turn, the trio absolutely slayed it. The treasure was collected and the couloir was marked up with their unique signatures.

The knuckledragger doing his thing:

And the free-heelin' hippy showing us how he does it:

After a most satisfying descent, the trio languidly made their way back down to where they started. 12 hours after setting out on this adventure they made it back to home base. Tired, scraped, bruised, and banged up, the trio high fived one another in celebration of the day. Upon their return to Maggotdom, their story of determination, desire, and success was told to the community…..